It's a 40 min drive to the Nusi Wockhardt, I already know the road well by now but it's difficult to relax on the journey. This is now the second night that Justin has been "alone" or without his family around him. At least when we were there, we felt like we were doing something, probably all the wrong things. But the staff at the Nusi are incredible, so attentive and caring. We are put straight at ease the minute we walk into the building. Justin has his physio session before we arrive this is to prevent muscle atrophy and to keep his joints from stiffening. It's an hour work out and must be physically exhausting, by the time we get to see him he is fast asleep. He's seems to be sleeping more now whereas the last couple of days in the GMC he was showing more signs of being awake and conscious. In fact, the doctor reassured us that he is more relaxed and at peace as opposed to the stress and anxiety that he was under before. He certainly looks a lot better for it and one can only imagine that this will have a positive impact on the overall healing process. There are times during the day when he opens his eyes but I would imagine that this is not due to disturbances as before, but more a gentle awakening of the senses and that can only be a good thing.
We have restructured the visits whist Justin is in ICU to allow for more time per person and less faces throughout the day. It's important that we don't overload his senses and we all feel more comfortable that we're not rushing our precious time with him. He's allowed to listen to music, even when sleeping so I played him some Doors, he's always considered himself a bit of a Jim Morrison character. One of his nurses came over and asked me if he'd been in accident. "Sorry" I replied, "Yes, an accident" she said. Now I have to confess that I would stoop to sarcasm on any other occasion but she was being genuinely nice so I said, "yes, a little accident", pursing my lips. Then she said, "Yes I noticed he has a scar on his thumb, bolts in his ankle, another scar on his nose…" Bless her! She didn't even mention his broken collar bone.
I asked if they could shave the rest of his hair off, I know it's a small thing but for those of you that know him, I'm sure you will agree that he would not be a happy soldier if he knew he had 2 very different hairstyles going on. I'm going to shave mine off tomorrow in solidarity. Wish me luck!
After the visit I had a brief consultation with Justin's Neurologist. He's a serious chap as one would expect. He peers at you over his glasses which rest precariously on the bridge of his nose with is sleepy half open eyes. I was a little worried at first as he didn't exactly give us the best of news yesterday. In fact he was a little bit more positive. When Justin arrived there, they very much treated his case as an emergency, here's a patient that is in coma, has a fever, clearly anxious and quite frankly looked a bit worse for wear. This plus the severity of Justin's condition was conveyed to us in a very matter of fact and some would say brutal way. Now it seems they are satisfied that Justin is out of the danger zone, more settled in his surroundings, fever under control or almost gone and generally more relaxed, even showing signs of improvement. The doctors have a very clever way of easing you in, he was settling us in for the long haul but we knew that already. Justin may be in this hospital for a few months, but from where we are now, I'm prepared for the wait because it will be worth it in the end.
Thanks for all the encouraging comments on my updates. I don't consider myself to be the most prolific writer, in fact far from it. I've made a couple of attempts at keeping a blog in the past but failed miserably to maintain it. This however is different, I feel compelled to share this story, it will be the most amazing story. The love and support for Justin has reaffirmed my faith in humanity and it's only fair that you all share in the glory of it. I've never felt compelled to unravel my thoughts, certainly not in this way, but writing this story is helping me make sense of it all in the best way that I never knew I could. But ultimately this is not for me but for Justin, the strength I get from expressing myself through these updates and the encouraging words I receive from you all fuels a belief in Justin that is so strong it's impossible to describe. Justin and I are not only connected by blood but we are connected by our souls, it's a brotherly relationship without flaw, a love and friendship that is without any doubt, perfect in every way.
Now, I've never given much thought to lot of these alternative healing techniques. It's not that I don't believe in them, I prefer to remain agnostic, but I'll try anything once. So given that nobody was watching, I thought I'd make up my own version. As Justin lay peacefully asleep, I placed my left hand on his forehead and closed my eyes. I started to repeat the mantra, C'MON JUSTIN… C'MON JUSTIN… over and over in my mind, it got stronger and louder, until I could feel the chant engulf me, I could feel it and hear it from the terraces of the running track and the auditorium of the Judo dojo and I felt it rise up and pass straight through me. Maybe I was just having a "judder" moment but it was our moment, we shared it and felt it together and that's what brotherly love is all about.
C'MON JUSTIN...
We have restructured the visits whist Justin is in ICU to allow for more time per person and less faces throughout the day. It's important that we don't overload his senses and we all feel more comfortable that we're not rushing our precious time with him. He's allowed to listen to music, even when sleeping so I played him some Doors, he's always considered himself a bit of a Jim Morrison character. One of his nurses came over and asked me if he'd been in accident. "Sorry" I replied, "Yes, an accident" she said. Now I have to confess that I would stoop to sarcasm on any other occasion but she was being genuinely nice so I said, "yes, a little accident", pursing my lips. Then she said, "Yes I noticed he has a scar on his thumb, bolts in his ankle, another scar on his nose…" Bless her! She didn't even mention his broken collar bone.
I asked if they could shave the rest of his hair off, I know it's a small thing but for those of you that know him, I'm sure you will agree that he would not be a happy soldier if he knew he had 2 very different hairstyles going on. I'm going to shave mine off tomorrow in solidarity. Wish me luck!
After the visit I had a brief consultation with Justin's Neurologist. He's a serious chap as one would expect. He peers at you over his glasses which rest precariously on the bridge of his nose with is sleepy half open eyes. I was a little worried at first as he didn't exactly give us the best of news yesterday. In fact he was a little bit more positive. When Justin arrived there, they very much treated his case as an emergency, here's a patient that is in coma, has a fever, clearly anxious and quite frankly looked a bit worse for wear. This plus the severity of Justin's condition was conveyed to us in a very matter of fact and some would say brutal way. Now it seems they are satisfied that Justin is out of the danger zone, more settled in his surroundings, fever under control or almost gone and generally more relaxed, even showing signs of improvement. The doctors have a very clever way of easing you in, he was settling us in for the long haul but we knew that already. Justin may be in this hospital for a few months, but from where we are now, I'm prepared for the wait because it will be worth it in the end.
Thanks for all the encouraging comments on my updates. I don't consider myself to be the most prolific writer, in fact far from it. I've made a couple of attempts at keeping a blog in the past but failed miserably to maintain it. This however is different, I feel compelled to share this story, it will be the most amazing story. The love and support for Justin has reaffirmed my faith in humanity and it's only fair that you all share in the glory of it. I've never felt compelled to unravel my thoughts, certainly not in this way, but writing this story is helping me make sense of it all in the best way that I never knew I could. But ultimately this is not for me but for Justin, the strength I get from expressing myself through these updates and the encouraging words I receive from you all fuels a belief in Justin that is so strong it's impossible to describe. Justin and I are not only connected by blood but we are connected by our souls, it's a brotherly relationship without flaw, a love and friendship that is without any doubt, perfect in every way.
Now, I've never given much thought to lot of these alternative healing techniques. It's not that I don't believe in them, I prefer to remain agnostic, but I'll try anything once. So given that nobody was watching, I thought I'd make up my own version. As Justin lay peacefully asleep, I placed my left hand on his forehead and closed my eyes. I started to repeat the mantra, C'MON JUSTIN… C'MON JUSTIN… over and over in my mind, it got stronger and louder, until I could feel the chant engulf me, I could feel it and hear it from the terraces of the running track and the auditorium of the Judo dojo and I felt it rise up and pass straight through me. Maybe I was just having a "judder" moment but it was our moment, we shared it and felt it together and that's what brotherly love is all about.
C'MON JUSTIN...
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