The last couple of months have been a period of transition for Justin. During his time at Broomfield and at Northwick Park hospital, he had been undergoing extensive assessments and evaluation. If I were to be truly honest, I was hoping, or even expecting, that Justin would make greater improvements than he has done. That's not to say that there has been no progress, in fact far from it, he beat me at Connect 4 the other day then we had a little a sing-a-long to LA woman by the Doors. But the reality is that he still has a long long way to go in all areas, physical, emotional, behavioural, memory etc.
There has been some complications too, on entering Northwick Park Hospital Regional Rehab Unit one month ago, a routine blood test detected a bacteria that is resistant to all known antibiotics. Whilst this is not causing Justin any known problems, tight infection control at the hospital has meant that he's had to remain in isolation the whole time. This has really limited his rehab, especially his physiotherapy as he's been unable to leave his room and use the gym facilities or interact with anyone outside of the visitors that are allowed in his room. We also feel that this has had an adverse effect on his behaviour, staring at the same 4 walls 24 hours a day is enough to send anyone mad.
But it's not all doom and gloom, despite the setbacks, I feel there has been some breakthroughs too. Up until recently, Justin rejected any suggestion of listening to music. Now he is happy to and even chooses the artist or album that he wants to hear, with a bit of guess work on our part. He will even put his arm in the air to sound of his own mixes, thats my boy! There has been improvements in his communication too. He can read remarkably well, two, three word sentences on a good day, names and places, object recognition have all improved too. These are all positive signs and bode well according to his speech and language therapist. We bought Justin an iPad so that he can listen to music, look at photos, watch movies and even check his Facebook when he's ready. It has come in really useful for writing as he finds it easier to write with his finger as opposed to using a pen or pencil. Baring in mind he is using his left hand (he's right handed), he has managed to write several words, some random, some prompted, mostly his own and Brookland's name but nonetheless, readable letters and words. Although limited now, it can only improve with time and will certainly help him communicate more while his speech is still somewhat limited.
Physically, Justin has gained all the weight that he lost in India, he looks a million times better for it. He still has limited movement on his right side but has good movement and co-ordination on his left side. He can eat and drink himself with little assistance and even play Connect 4. I've been encouraging him to do some of these things with his right arm with varying degrees of success, it all depends how relaxed he is at the time.
You may remember a while back, a post where Justin had taken a couple of assisted steps. It was an exciting breakthrough and was possibly the start of some amazing progress. Unfortunately it never really progressed beyond that, but I don't believe it was due to the unwillingness on Justin's part. This all happened in the last week or so at Broomfield Hospital where the pace of rehab slowed down as he was then moved very soon after to Northwick Park. We were led to believe he was to undergo extensive rehab including physio, however, this didn't happen because of the bacteria and the subsequent isolation. So any significant physical improvements slowed right down which was a huge disappointment for everyone.
To sum up Justin's time at Northwick Park, I think I can speak on behalf of all our family, we all feel a bit disappointed. I appreciate that infection control measures have to be in place and enforced in a hospital environment to protect other vulnerable patients but that has come at a price, Justin's rehabilitation has suffered. That's simply not fair on Justin, no matter how you look at at.
Therefore it was with great relief to find out two weeks ago that Justin was to be moved out of Northwick Park and into The Gardens Neurological Center in Sawbridgeworth. This facility specialises in slow stream rehabilitation for patience with serious neurological disorders and specialist needs like Justin's. It is a private facility with treatment funded by the NHS and will offer Justin all the rehabilitation that he'll need to reach his maximum potential. So whilst everyone was preparing for xmas on the 24th December, Justin was being taken by ambulance to his new home where he will most likely be for the next year or possibly more. I'm now in Norway but I saw him just before I left and he was looking forward to the move, he'd also had enough of Northwick Park and had even mentioned to Brookland that he was lonely there. I spoke to Dad yesterday and he said Justin seemed happy and content with his new surroundings. Mum and Dad spent Christmas day with him where apparently he was excited to open his presents. It goes without saying that I'm looking forward to seeing him when I get back on the 30th and witness him using his electric shaver, electric toothbrush and other things that perhaps he would never have bought before but they will certainly help him regain some independence, little by little.
I remember Justin's friend Barney saying something in a post a while back, something about "Justin has been on the minor roads until now, Northwick Park was his highway to recovery". It was a bit more eloquently put than that but whilst Justin may have been on the highway home, he got stuck in the hard shoulder for a bit. The fast lane clearly wasn't for him so he's taking the A roads for a while, there may be more roundabouts and crossroads this way but all roads have to lead to somewhere, and its that somewhere that he'll get to in the end.
C'MON JUSTIN
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Quick Update - 13th September 2012
We are home!!!
After a hellish 14 hour ambulance drive to Mumbai, 5 hour wait in the airport, 9 hour flight to Heathrow and a 90 min drive to Chelmsford, we finally arrived at Broomfield Hospital at 21.30pm. I can honestly say that it was the most emotionally challenging 30 hours of my life, so I can't imagine what it must have been like for Justin. But like everything he has done so far, he dug deep, put a brave face on and came through, Justin you are a LEGEND!
Justin is now settled into his new surroundings and I can't tell you how relieved we all are. On entering ward 125 and meeting Jill Downey, the senior ward sister and all of the other nursing staff, a huge weight fell from my shoulders. But there's no rest for the wicked in there, today he will start his new round of therapies. There's no more 24 hour bedside vigil for us either, with a strict routine and timetable to follow, our visiting times are restricted to 2 sessions per day. This is where the magic happens, I can feel it.
We left the hospital at 23.00pm as there was a hive of activity around Justin's bed. I shed a tear or two but knowing that he is in good hands now!
A special thank you to the Nusi Wockhardt Hospital and a huge thank you to everyone in Goa for their support, fundraising and love, we'll never be able to thank you enough and we'll never forget what you have done for Justin and our family. We love you all XXX. We're now looking forward to seeing some friends here in the UK.
A more detailed update to follow on Justin progress both in the last 2 weeks and over the next few days... once I get some sleep.
C'MON JUSTIN!
After a hellish 14 hour ambulance drive to Mumbai, 5 hour wait in the airport, 9 hour flight to Heathrow and a 90 min drive to Chelmsford, we finally arrived at Broomfield Hospital at 21.30pm. I can honestly say that it was the most emotionally challenging 30 hours of my life, so I can't imagine what it must have been like for Justin. But like everything he has done so far, he dug deep, put a brave face on and came through, Justin you are a LEGEND!
Justin is now settled into his new surroundings and I can't tell you how relieved we all are. On entering ward 125 and meeting Jill Downey, the senior ward sister and all of the other nursing staff, a huge weight fell from my shoulders. But there's no rest for the wicked in there, today he will start his new round of therapies. There's no more 24 hour bedside vigil for us either, with a strict routine and timetable to follow, our visiting times are restricted to 2 sessions per day. This is where the magic happens, I can feel it.
We left the hospital at 23.00pm as there was a hive of activity around Justin's bed. I shed a tear or two but knowing that he is in good hands now!
A special thank you to the Nusi Wockhardt Hospital and a huge thank you to everyone in Goa for their support, fundraising and love, we'll never be able to thank you enough and we'll never forget what you have done for Justin and our family. We love you all XXX. We're now looking forward to seeing some friends here in the UK.
A more detailed update to follow on Justin progress both in the last 2 weeks and over the next few days... once I get some sleep.
C'MON JUSTIN!
Monday, August 27, 2012
Justin update - 27th August 2012
As I have previously mentioned on the Facebook group, it has been some two months since I have last seen Justin at which time he had been lying immobile in a semi-coma at the government hospital in Panjim, pipes coming from his nose and throat, an absent look in his eyes, deep purple bruising throughout his upper left side, severe swelling of his right arm and, of course, some serious head injuries.
Since then I have been following Justin’s progress, as have we all, through the heartfelt and candid voice of Scott and during several conversations that he and I have shared during the course of my absence from India.
I met Justin several years ago, at a beach party in Palolem. We spoke very briefly yet a quiet friendship developed over the course of that season with the last couple of years being when we got to know each other properly. There began a mutual respect and back up for one another that may have even gone unnoticed by our peers. We wouldn’t see each other or speak for days or weeks at a time but when we did it was for a reason, we wanted to catch up, had things to talk about and we trusted each others thoughts and opinions. This is in my mind as I am on my way to see him.
I am now with Scott as we approach the private hospital where Justin now receives the care that he needs. My heart skips a few beats as Scott prepares me to expect many tears from Justin and I wondered how many tears I may shed myself as I see my mate for the first time since my return to India.
Jan, Justin's mum met me outside of his room and gave me a hug while Scott prepared Justin for my visit. My heartbeat is now galloping from the apprehension that stirs within me, of seeing Justin for myself and to gauge my own thoughts of the progress that he has made. The door to his room opens, Scott comes out and I go in.
The room lights up, as does my heart, as Justin welcomes me with a broad smile, a “Hello mate” and his hand of friendship. His grip was weak but good as we both held firm as I lent down and kissed him on the cheek and receiving a kiss in return.
He maintains eye contact as we speak. There is a fair amount of mumbling between a few perfect words and he seems to understand some of what I am saying but finds it difficult to vocalize his thoughts. He wants to show me what he is able to do on a physical level by stretching his legs out as much as he is able with clear signs of pain. I feel that Justin somehow associates me with physical activity from within his memories when I used to train him.
He spoke constantly throughout my visit although I was unable to decipher much of what he is trying to say but I do believe that he knows what he is saying in his own mind. I find this very frustrating as I desperately want to understand him and cannot imagine how frustrating it might be for him. I shall be honest in saying that at no point did Justin and I have a full conversation. He repeated the odd word within a sentence but I do not think that he always understands what that word might mean.
He did, as Scott said he would, shed a few tears, as did I silently from within. But not from sadness or concern for my dear friend, my tears came from marvel and wonder. Justin may not be speaking fluently and coherently but he certainly is thinking and attempting to convey these thoughts in his mind through his lips. He is moving every limb, some better than others. He is eating solid foods and the pipes from his throat and nose are gone. The purple and swelling are also gone. The wounds to his head have healed well and he has a good crop of hair, still no greys!! For me, the greatest joy was seeing life and awareness within his eyes that were all but vacant not so long ago.
On my second visit to Justin I gave him some one on one physio and then aided the physiotherapist that tends to him each day. I cannot say how my session may have differed from any previous sessions that he has had but I can say that he fought through pain and tiredness every step of the way as if to please me with his efforts which he surely did. He cried out in pain a few times, pushed out an extra rep here and there and cussed me out quite a lot, as he did when I used to train him before so nothing new there!!
Whether one believes in miracles or not one cannot doubt that Justin’s progress is miraculous. I for one believe that the word miraculous will continue to be used as we watch Justin from near and afar as he fights with true grit and determination onwards and upwards, no longer for his life but for the life that he wants to lead.
C’MON JUSTIN!!
Friday, August 24, 2012
Justin update - 24th August 2012
It's been 7 days since my last confession… er I mean update and Justin is still fighting away, surprising everyone with his progress. What's most notable in the last week or so are his vocal abilities, he's gone from whispering and not being heard, to speaking louder and not being understood. Justin has been diagnosed with a condition known as Fluent Aphasia which is a speech and language communication problem caused by damage to the language centers of the brain. The simplest way to describe it is imagine constantly having the words on the tip of your tongue yet not being able to say them. We all know how frustrating that can be and for Justin, it's beginning to show but I'll forgive him for a bit of 'effing and blinding, for now. He was due to start speech therapy this week but the therapist can't talk as she has a sore throat, hmm! Once the treatment starts it should help him connect the dots. He'll get his speech back eventually with some intensive therapy, but he may always have some issues.
He does manage to get the words out sometimes, in fact he gave me a right earful during the physio session yesterday, a sign of things to come I feel. Our friend Max Chandra stepped in to assist today, he's a lot bigger than us so Justin would have thought twice about about telling him to F*** off. We had a little giggle too, we were both watching '2 and A Half Men' and Justin spontaneously starting singing the theme tune "Men, Men Men, Men, Manly Men, Do Do Doo Do Do Doo Do Doo". I thought I'd strike while the iron was hot so I asked him to do the alphabet, I started a,b,c d etc, to which he said "What song is that then?" I replied, "it's the alphabet song of course", he went "oh yeah" and began singing the "alphabet song" but he only got up to G then went back to the theme tune to "2 and A Half Men"
There's a lot been happening outside of the hospital this week too. We have finally got Justin accepted into the Broomfields Hospital in Chelmsford, Essex which by all accounts has a fantastic rehabilitation unit. It's a huge weight off our shoulders and it means we can get the wheels in motion for Justin's repatriation. Medical repatriations don't come cheap apparently and since Justin didn't have any travel or medical insurance, we have to find about £20,000 in the next few weeks, gulp! But in the grand scheme of things, it's only money and by hook or by crook, we'll raise it and get our man back to the UK.
I don't need to keep telling you that I'm blown away daily by the kindness and generosity of Justin's friends old and new, and strangers near and far. The level of love and support that we have seen and felt is immeasurable. Sometimes Justin seems so confused, afraid and alone but I know he's not, he has you all, he's in your thoughts and in your hearts and I tell him this always. I'm so proud of you mate. C'MON JUSTIN… you can do this, you are doing this.
This weekend is a special one, Saturday night is the 444 Fundraiser at Westbourne Studios in London. Some of Justin's close friends have put on a fundraising extravaganza to rival anything in London on the same night. Great venue, Superstar DJ's including the Silent Noise resident DJ's plus special guest Justin Robertson from Lionrock, amazing raffle and auction prizes but most importantly a bunch of people all coming together for an incredible cause. If you're going, I hope you have a terrific night. If your Saturday night is still not decided, get yourself down to Westbourne Studios in London or if you can't make it then you can still take part and win some amazing prizes. All the details are here.
http://444justin.blogspot.in/p/444-fundraiser-250812.html
I really wish I could be there, to thank you all for everything that you've done for Justin over the last couple of months but sadly I can't make it, I've got an evening planned in front of the TV with Justin watching 2 and a Half Men and eating alphabet spaghetti.
He does manage to get the words out sometimes, in fact he gave me a right earful during the physio session yesterday, a sign of things to come I feel. Our friend Max Chandra stepped in to assist today, he's a lot bigger than us so Justin would have thought twice about about telling him to F*** off. We had a little giggle too, we were both watching '2 and A Half Men' and Justin spontaneously starting singing the theme tune "Men, Men Men, Men, Manly Men, Do Do Doo Do Do Doo Do Doo". I thought I'd strike while the iron was hot so I asked him to do the alphabet, I started a,b,c d etc, to which he said "What song is that then?" I replied, "it's the alphabet song of course", he went "oh yeah" and began singing the "alphabet song" but he only got up to G then went back to the theme tune to "2 and A Half Men"
There's a lot been happening outside of the hospital this week too. We have finally got Justin accepted into the Broomfields Hospital in Chelmsford, Essex which by all accounts has a fantastic rehabilitation unit. It's a huge weight off our shoulders and it means we can get the wheels in motion for Justin's repatriation. Medical repatriations don't come cheap apparently and since Justin didn't have any travel or medical insurance, we have to find about £20,000 in the next few weeks, gulp! But in the grand scheme of things, it's only money and by hook or by crook, we'll raise it and get our man back to the UK.
I don't need to keep telling you that I'm blown away daily by the kindness and generosity of Justin's friends old and new, and strangers near and far. The level of love and support that we have seen and felt is immeasurable. Sometimes Justin seems so confused, afraid and alone but I know he's not, he has you all, he's in your thoughts and in your hearts and I tell him this always. I'm so proud of you mate. C'MON JUSTIN… you can do this, you are doing this.
This weekend is a special one, Saturday night is the 444 Fundraiser at Westbourne Studios in London. Some of Justin's close friends have put on a fundraising extravaganza to rival anything in London on the same night. Great venue, Superstar DJ's including the Silent Noise resident DJ's plus special guest Justin Robertson from Lionrock, amazing raffle and auction prizes but most importantly a bunch of people all coming together for an incredible cause. If you're going, I hope you have a terrific night. If your Saturday night is still not decided, get yourself down to Westbourne Studios in London or if you can't make it then you can still take part and win some amazing prizes. All the details are here.
http://444justin.blogspot.in/p/444-fundraiser-250812.html
I really wish I could be there, to thank you all for everything that you've done for Justin over the last couple of months but sadly I can't make it, I've got an evening planned in front of the TV with Justin watching 2 and a Half Men and eating alphabet spaghetti.
 |
| Where it all began. Me and Justin at the Laughing Buddha, Palolem Beach, Goa, 2004 |
Friday, August 17, 2012
Justin update - 17th August 2012
I was going to start with a heart warming story about how Justin came to my rescue several years ago after I had a motorbike accident in Nepal, it's a funny story but I'll save it for another time. I just wanted this update to simply be about the huge leaps forward that Justin has made in the last 3 weeks. Has it been three weeks since my last update? Where does the time go?
We've accepted that Justin's progress cannot be measured in days or even weeks, realistically we're looking at a month on month basis to notice any real significant improvements. Thats not to say things are not happening daily, they are and no matter how small, a movement of a toe, a new memory, a followed command, a flex of the ankle, a laugh and even a little wave goodbye, they are all milestones for Justin.
I've been procrastinating over this latest update for many reasons. The last few weeks have been 'emotional' for want of a better word, especially for Justin. It was inevitable that as he moved closer to the surface, he would start to realise the severity of his situation. We all have them occasionally, but I would imagine that Justin's 'moments of clarity' are not filled with the joyous wonders of life and all things bright and beautiful. He wakes up daily to the horrifying fact that he can't move his arms or legs, feels pain where he didn't before, can't remember names or places, can't express himself or communicate in the way that he should be able to and feels frustrated that we can't understand him, I could go on. For Justin his awakening is proving to be the nightmare come true that we all fear for ourselves and our loved ones.
But we shouldn't dwell on the negative, the big changes from 3 weeks ago is that Justin is now able to express his emotions, he has dug deep and found the strength to challenge his paralysis, his brain is working overtime firing new signals, making new connections, performing new functions and taking over old ones. He is trying to communicate more using his voice, the faint whispering is slowly being replaced with a more coherent chatter, words and sentences flow at times, conversations can even be held, with a little prompting here and there. However, he doesn't always make sense, there's a lot of guesswork, the gap between what Justin is thinking and what he is actually saying still needs to be bridged but there's definitely more comprehension. Justin is now well aware of his situation and knows that he's got mountains to climb to overcome it. And that is the big breakthrough!
I now look back at the video of the first thumb wrestling in sheer wonderment, it's astonishing what the human body can go through and even more so, how it can repair. We were told some cold hard truths about Justin's condition and the bleakness of his prognosis, and yet he seems to be defying all the odds. We've heard the doctors say "He's doing better than expected" and "…better in 6 weeks than other patients in 6 months…", I've even heard Dr Doom, who I'm warming too a little, confess "…I didn't expect this!" after he was told about Justin talking. I shouldn't mock Dr Doom, he, like all of the staff at the hospital are incredible (I now know they read this blog :) and I'm so grateful to them for all that they are doing, not just for Justin but for our entire family.
One of the toughest things we've had to consider over the last few weeks has been when to introduce new visitors for Justin. We had come close several times and when presented this to him, he had either been very negative or his reaction was difficult to gauge, so we've backed off and waited for a different moment. We wanted to ensure that it was for all the right reasons. It needed to simply be for Justin, to know that his friends are there for him, to offer him comfort, support and reassurances and to tell him they loved him, which they all obviously would, but he needed to be comfortable with his own self. In the last week, Justin seemed a lot more receptive to the idea, and as a result a couple of Justin's closest friends have spent some quality time with him, it was magical to see the spark of recognition in his face as soon as he set eyes on them. It's also brought a lot of emotions to the surface and there has been a few tears from all involved. But hey, there's nothing wrong with a couple of grown men crying, sometimes it's good to let the boo hoos out.
At some point soon, Justin will require less hospitalisation and more specialist therapies. As much as we admire the hospital, the facilities and all the staff here, it's important that Justin return to the UK soon to continue his treatment there. Our parents obviously need to get back to their lives in the UK, and myself, Anita and Talo will most likely take a year out of our lives in Nepal and return to the UK with Justin too. Plans are currently being made for his repatriation and admission to a hospital, this could happen in about 4 weeks from now.
Today after probably one of the most most grueling physio sessions he's had, we got Justin into the wheelchair where I wanted to take him outside for a bit of fresh air. Two days ago I had brought in his favourite purple shirt, as he sat in the chair, I draped it around his shoulders and we set off for the great outdoors. In truth, there wasn't a great deal of fresh air, it was humid and sticky and the sun was beating down on us but it didn't matter, Justin looked good, the best he's looked in weeks. But there was still something missing, then I realised, he would never have left the house in broad daylight without his sunglasses. What was I thinking? Sorry Justin, my mistake, I'll remember tomorrow, I promise
444 Fundraiser.
Justin's friends are holding a special charity event in London on the 25.08.12 to raise a glass and a few quid for Justin's medical and rehabilitation needs.
They have put together an incredible collection of prizes that can be won won via a raffle or auction.
If you're in London the night before Notting Hill Carnival, get yourself over to Westbourne Studios where none other than Justin Robertson will be rocking the tunes for the cause.
If you can't make the event, you can still buy raffle tickets or place a bid to win an amazing prize.
Please click on the link to find out how it all works and see the list of prizes on offer.
http://444justin.blogspot.in/p/444-fundraiser-250812.html
C'MON JUSTIN...
Monday, July 30, 2012
Justin update - 30th July 2012
It's been several days now since my last update, the longest gap since I started writing it. I could just write one liners each day but I'll end up repeating myself, I also don't want to dwell on the not so good days. We all have bad days from time to time, and Justin is no different. By allowing a few days or a week to go by, I can focus on the improvements and not the setbacks, of which there are few to be honest.
In the last few days I've been feeling a little guilty about even writing these updates. Despite the image that you may have of Justin, the ever youthful looking 24 hour party person who revels in the limelight and lives a hedonistic lifestyle many of us left behind years ago. There is a softer gentle side to Justin, a very sensitive and private person, a thinker, a man of few words who is happy in his own company. He chooses to live alone, he works out in his gym, mixes music in his studio and cycles daily to keep himself in shape and probably to gather his thoughts. Would Justin want his story published for the world to see? He might have reservations but I'm hoping he'll understand my reasons. However I've decided, until he tells me to stop, to continue to write it. But rather commiserate on the accident, his injuries and the long and arduous road ahead. I want this to be a celebration of Justin, who he is, who he'll become, but most of all, this extraordinary recovery that we are all witness to. I've always said, and Justin will agree with me, it didn't mater how many times he fell in shit, he'd always come up smelling of roses. So we can all expect a lovely rosy smelling Justin to come rising up at the end of this unfortunate little tumble.
To see Justin now is like looking at a different person from a week ago. He is more awake than asleep during the day, his eyes are alert and responsive, the thousand yard stare has been replaced with a look of curiosity and wonder. His mind is working overtime, trying to piece all of the parts together, faces, names, places, pictures, sounds. At times there is even a sparkle in his eye. Justin is now free from all tubes and is taking all food through his mouth including some solids. His tracheotomy hole is completely healed, and although still sore, he is vocalising more and more, much of which is still mumbling but I'm beginning to hear some words other than Yes and No. His physio is taxing but he knows it needs to be done and will really concentrate and try to follow the commands when asked. His left arm and hand movements are improving daily and even in the last 2 days he has moved his right hand, a massive breakthrough. His legs are tense and tight which makes physio on them more of a challenge but I'm confident this will come with more work. I find that doing the exercises with him is the most rewarding part of the day for both of us, we fought and trained together as kids so I know that he won't object to me pushing him on now. I really feel that he's aware of his situation at times and knows that he's got to do it for his own sake.
He's now able to sit up almost unaided, so much so that he's been in a wheelchair and even taken on a sightseeing tour of the hospital corridors, much to the delight of the nursing staff from the ICU who all came out to see him. At one point there was about 20 smiling nurses standing around him, they love him here, who wouldn't.
Justin's daughter Brookland arrived a couple of days ago, I can't tell you how tough it's been for her but she's been a true star. It's been an emotional time and without doubt one of he hardest things she's had to deal with but she handled the situation with aplomb. We had been telling Justin for weeks that Brookland was coming and when he saw her walk through the door, his face lit up and he smiled from ear to ear. She leaned over her dad to give him a hug, he bent his head forward to kiss her, It was all too much for me, I had to leave the room. About 5 minutes later she rushed out to tell me that when she told him she loved him, he replied as clear as day "I love you too"
C'MON JUSTIN...
In the last few days I've been feeling a little guilty about even writing these updates. Despite the image that you may have of Justin, the ever youthful looking 24 hour party person who revels in the limelight and lives a hedonistic lifestyle many of us left behind years ago. There is a softer gentle side to Justin, a very sensitive and private person, a thinker, a man of few words who is happy in his own company. He chooses to live alone, he works out in his gym, mixes music in his studio and cycles daily to keep himself in shape and probably to gather his thoughts. Would Justin want his story published for the world to see? He might have reservations but I'm hoping he'll understand my reasons. However I've decided, until he tells me to stop, to continue to write it. But rather commiserate on the accident, his injuries and the long and arduous road ahead. I want this to be a celebration of Justin, who he is, who he'll become, but most of all, this extraordinary recovery that we are all witness to. I've always said, and Justin will agree with me, it didn't mater how many times he fell in shit, he'd always come up smelling of roses. So we can all expect a lovely rosy smelling Justin to come rising up at the end of this unfortunate little tumble.
To see Justin now is like looking at a different person from a week ago. He is more awake than asleep during the day, his eyes are alert and responsive, the thousand yard stare has been replaced with a look of curiosity and wonder. His mind is working overtime, trying to piece all of the parts together, faces, names, places, pictures, sounds. At times there is even a sparkle in his eye. Justin is now free from all tubes and is taking all food through his mouth including some solids. His tracheotomy hole is completely healed, and although still sore, he is vocalising more and more, much of which is still mumbling but I'm beginning to hear some words other than Yes and No. His physio is taxing but he knows it needs to be done and will really concentrate and try to follow the commands when asked. His left arm and hand movements are improving daily and even in the last 2 days he has moved his right hand, a massive breakthrough. His legs are tense and tight which makes physio on them more of a challenge but I'm confident this will come with more work. I find that doing the exercises with him is the most rewarding part of the day for both of us, we fought and trained together as kids so I know that he won't object to me pushing him on now. I really feel that he's aware of his situation at times and knows that he's got to do it for his own sake.
He's now able to sit up almost unaided, so much so that he's been in a wheelchair and even taken on a sightseeing tour of the hospital corridors, much to the delight of the nursing staff from the ICU who all came out to see him. At one point there was about 20 smiling nurses standing around him, they love him here, who wouldn't.
Justin's daughter Brookland arrived a couple of days ago, I can't tell you how tough it's been for her but she's been a true star. It's been an emotional time and without doubt one of he hardest things she's had to deal with but she handled the situation with aplomb. We had been telling Justin for weeks that Brookland was coming and when he saw her walk through the door, his face lit up and he smiled from ear to ear. She leaned over her dad to give him a hug, he bent his head forward to kiss her, It was all too much for me, I had to leave the room. About 5 minutes later she rushed out to tell me that when she told him she loved him, he replied as clear as day "I love you too"
C'MON JUSTIN...
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Justin update - 24th July 2012
With every day that passes, we're moving further away from the tragic event that got us here and edging closer towards facing the enormity of the challenges that lie ahead. It's a scary road and one that none of us were prepared for. We have too many questions, there are so many uncertainties, we can't plan for anything or expect anything and since we're all outside of our country of residence it makes all of these things even harder to bare. Despite all of this, it's amazing what the human spirit can cope with, how we can change, adapt and move forward. Life literally just goes on, it just has to doesn't it.
I'm finding it harder to write daily updates for Justin, simply because there seems to be few significant changes from 1 day to the next. For every 2 good days, we seem to have a bad day, or shall we say less good one. Over the last few days, Justin's blood pressure had risen to a worrying level, it's now down close to normal again but it's unclear as to why this happened. His daily physio sessions are proving to be physically demanding on him, he seems exhausted and just wants to sleep afterwards, this makes it tough to engage him in any other form of interaction. The doctors are trying hard to assess his level of comprehension, I believe it's improving daily in terms of what he is able to understand. He is able to express himself through some movements, nodding or shaking his head, facial movements etc but other than a croaky "Yeah" and "No", I've still seen no evidence that he can talk as yet, although he is trying harder every day. He's not a great talker anyway so I'm not expecting much even when he does. One of the highlights for me is seeing some glimpses of his personality through his facial expressions, it makes my day!
For the past few days I've found myself asking, are we doing enough for Justin? At this stage of his recovery, is there more we should be doing to improve his levels of comprehension? What would stimulate Justin's senses? Is he getting enough physio? What areas should we be focussing on? What about drugs, is he on the right ones? etc etc, I could go on and on. Consultations with his Neurologist do provide some answers but it still doesn't stop me wondering. I feel we need to seize every moment, especially at this crucial time when it seems Justin is yearning for positive interactions. We need to find a balance of what's best for Justin and what he is comfortable with. Pushing him in the direction that he's moving in but not to the point where he begins to withdraw. I guess at the end of the day, in the grand scheme of things, it's still only just over a week since he emerged from his coma and just over 4 weeks since he went into it. So in the words of yet another doctor "It will take some time" I can't tell you how many times I've heard that sentence in the last month.
444:
What's all this 444 fuss I hear you ask? Well in a nutshell, Ever since we were kids Justin has had this mild obsession with the numbers 444. He would see the combination of numbers on a regular basis and would even wake me up at 4:44am to tell me. We were as young as 8 and 10 or something. This continued through his childhood all the way to adult hood. I can't say how often Justin sees this combination of numbers, maybe he's looking for them, maybe he just notices them, maybe he's been setting his alarm at 4:44am everyday since we were kids, who knows, it's his favourite number and who are we to argue. After the accident, a few of his friends were posting 444 pictures and messages on Facebook, someone posted a link to a website for numerology meanings where I discovered that if one is seeing the numbers 444 it suggest that you are surrounded by angels, they are there with you and at times of need one needs to ask them for help. Well, they weren't there when he ploughed into a cow on his scooter 4 weeks ago but it seems somebody came to his aide, maybe they were Justin's angles and maybe they have been with him ever since. Strangely though, I too have been seeing a few 444's lately and there's no way I'm setting my alarm clock at that time in the morning.
Back in the summer of 2009 Justin and a few friends, built a small recording studio and made some music.
Below is a link to one of the tracks they produced. It's a cracking breaks track with a cheeky baseline, some wicked vocals and a funky guitar riff!
The track priced at £2.00+ is being re-released and all proceeds go towards Justin's ongoing rehabilitation. Why not throw in the price of a beer too, Justin would appreciate that.
Please BUY THE TRACK, and share this link far and wide with everyone you know... Let's see how much we can raise!
Click here to download the track.
Rebel Royal & Justin Mason - Backdoor Kicker (fundraiser edit)
DOWNLOAD NOW
C'MON JUSTIN...
I'm finding it harder to write daily updates for Justin, simply because there seems to be few significant changes from 1 day to the next. For every 2 good days, we seem to have a bad day, or shall we say less good one. Over the last few days, Justin's blood pressure had risen to a worrying level, it's now down close to normal again but it's unclear as to why this happened. His daily physio sessions are proving to be physically demanding on him, he seems exhausted and just wants to sleep afterwards, this makes it tough to engage him in any other form of interaction. The doctors are trying hard to assess his level of comprehension, I believe it's improving daily in terms of what he is able to understand. He is able to express himself through some movements, nodding or shaking his head, facial movements etc but other than a croaky "Yeah" and "No", I've still seen no evidence that he can talk as yet, although he is trying harder every day. He's not a great talker anyway so I'm not expecting much even when he does. One of the highlights for me is seeing some glimpses of his personality through his facial expressions, it makes my day!
For the past few days I've found myself asking, are we doing enough for Justin? At this stage of his recovery, is there more we should be doing to improve his levels of comprehension? What would stimulate Justin's senses? Is he getting enough physio? What areas should we be focussing on? What about drugs, is he on the right ones? etc etc, I could go on and on. Consultations with his Neurologist do provide some answers but it still doesn't stop me wondering. I feel we need to seize every moment, especially at this crucial time when it seems Justin is yearning for positive interactions. We need to find a balance of what's best for Justin and what he is comfortable with. Pushing him in the direction that he's moving in but not to the point where he begins to withdraw. I guess at the end of the day, in the grand scheme of things, it's still only just over a week since he emerged from his coma and just over 4 weeks since he went into it. So in the words of yet another doctor "It will take some time" I can't tell you how many times I've heard that sentence in the last month.
444:
What's all this 444 fuss I hear you ask? Well in a nutshell, Ever since we were kids Justin has had this mild obsession with the numbers 444. He would see the combination of numbers on a regular basis and would even wake me up at 4:44am to tell me. We were as young as 8 and 10 or something. This continued through his childhood all the way to adult hood. I can't say how often Justin sees this combination of numbers, maybe he's looking for them, maybe he just notices them, maybe he's been setting his alarm at 4:44am everyday since we were kids, who knows, it's his favourite number and who are we to argue. After the accident, a few of his friends were posting 444 pictures and messages on Facebook, someone posted a link to a website for numerology meanings where I discovered that if one is seeing the numbers 444 it suggest that you are surrounded by angels, they are there with you and at times of need one needs to ask them for help. Well, they weren't there when he ploughed into a cow on his scooter 4 weeks ago but it seems somebody came to his aide, maybe they were Justin's angles and maybe they have been with him ever since. Strangely though, I too have been seeing a few 444's lately and there's no way I'm setting my alarm clock at that time in the morning.
Below is a link to one of the tracks they produced. It's a cracking breaks track with a cheeky baseline, some wicked vocals and a funky guitar riff!
The track priced at £2.00+ is being re-released and all proceeds go towards Justin's ongoing rehabilitation. Why not throw in the price of a beer too, Justin would appreciate that.
Please BUY THE TRACK, and share this link far and wide with everyone you know... Let's see how much we can raise!
Click here to download the track.
Rebel Royal & Justin Mason - Backdoor Kicker (fundraiser edit)
DOWNLOAD NOW
C'MON JUSTIN...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)